hmm needs work

I'm drowning in a sea of white
the page just sits there reflecting the light
and slowly ravaging my eyes
blind to the answers; I only see the why's

There's no reason to feel so destroyed
I've got my health and, hell, I'm employed
Just enough to wet my whistle
drink so I can't feel

I never wanna be
like him
I never want to play
his games
but from behind
we already look the same

just please, please
believe in me

I can't see through this sea of black
I look down and the words look back
the words fly out from this pen
Creating a museum display of all my past sins

All of my feelings remain
I'm no different but I'm not the same.
New thoughts come into view
but they quickly become skewed
they retreat in a blur
I chase them but stumble to the floor

I cling to these letters
yet nothing feels better
they surround like a blanket
If you can't be happy...just fake it